Profile Manager: GCC Rotation & Layover Division
Oath Day Ashish
“Took the Oath of Allegiance on Tuesday. Started explaining India's foreign policy to Indians on Wednesday.”
A Note From the Family
“Ashish called us crying after the oath ceremony, then spent the same call explaining why India needs to 'get tougher' on a policy he read about that morning. We didn't have the heart to ask which country he meant it for. We are seeking a match who will hang the naturalization certificate exactly level, as he has requested four times.”
Gems of Wisdom
Dual Emotional Citizen
“I surrendered my Indian passport with real tears. I did not surrender a single opinion.”
Newly Objective Observer
“Now that I'm American, I finally have the objectivity to tell India what it's doing wrong.”
Identity in Progress
“The oath took 45 minutes. My WhatsApp status has been 'processing' for nine years.”
Multitasking Patriot
“I cried at the ceremony and then immediately fact-checked the naturalization officer's small talk.”
Seeking a Match Who
A partner who will listen to the full ceremony story again, unprompted, at every family function indefinitely.
Absolute Dealbreakers
Anyone who asks which passport he actually roots for during a cricket match. He has a 40-minute answer.
Endorsements
“Explained Indian election law to me at his own citizenship party. I am Indian. I live there.”
“Framed his oath certificate next to a garlanded photo of a temple he's visited twice.”
“Cried during the anthem, both anthems, in the same week, equally sincerely.”
Astro-Political Kundli Alignment
Certified by the LinkedIn Kundli Stalking Division
CAUTION: Mangal Dosha (Chronic Newly-Sworn Syndrome) detected in the 8th house. Avoid unscripted interactions.